WARNING: Rant dead ahead! May be offensive to Christians
So, Billy Graham has an advice column. Who knew?!? Check out this little gem.
Billy Graham Advice Column
Billy, don't you know that in our post-, post-modern world, Jeebus no longer lives in our hearts? He lives in the condo three doors down from my friend Abigail. He has a miniature chow named "Princess" whom he walks religiously every day. And he gives the best dinner parties. I have no idea where he gets his wine from but it's like the best homebrew, ever! I really must order a kit for myself this summer...
Seriously, Billy, WTF?!? I get that the whole point of right wing evangelism is to recruit but honestly...you cannot be telling me that you are giving love – LOVE, mind you – the smackdown?? And y'all wonder why the common people are running away from the church in droves? Bitch, please! You need to tell Pat Sajak that you want to buy a clue. No, scratch that. You should not, in fact, still be playing "Wheel of Fortune" when everyone else has moved onto "Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader?". That totally will not dovetail into your recruitment strategy.
Call me. We'll talk. Between you, me and Fall Out Boy, we'll have 'em packed in the pews in no time.;)
1 comment:
"You should not, in fact, still be playing "Wheel of Fortune" when everyone else has moved onto "Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader?". That totally will not dovetail into your recruitment strategy."
But what if he LIKES Wheel of Fortune, and doesn't that tell you something of his 'true desire' to move forward? Maybe, just maybe he's not as bold as he claims... maybe, just maybe he's a sheep in wolf's clothing.
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